I am trying to breathe today


I am not sure what it is about vacations and coming back to a cold, dark place that I live but I have a really hard time. I was thinking I was doing ok but after yesterday I just don’t feel ok. I am trying my hardest to be happy but the sadness keeps trying to creep in. I am just trying to keep breathing.

I was hoping that the Christmas decorating would help but I still feel this black cloud hovering over my head. I have a mixture of grumpy and sad in me.

I think its a number of things that seem to get me after vacations but the big part is always the huge excitement that is built up and loving everything about your trip and then you come and have to deal with reality again. And yesterday was a rough day and I still haven’t recouped from it.

I ask myself is my attitude worth catching? No so I better change it. I am going to get over it and find a way to escape the sadness.

I will not allow my slump any longer. I give myself these few days to pout and then I am going to dump that black cloud and I will choose to be joyful in every moment including the let downs.



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